100
by Kathy-Swan-Cullen
Summary: -Post Breaking Dawn Voltrui returned and killed the all the Cullens but Bella. Bella is left to pick the peices of her life with Jacob there to help her. BxJ I THINK i may go a different way but i'm not sure yet x3
1. Lost

100%

Here it was again. The pain as unbearable as the last time but multiplied by 1000 fold. I was dead, at least inside I was. I was sitting at least that's what I think I was doing I couldn't pay enough attention to really noticed, that is until my best friend came to sit down beside me. I felt his arms wrap around my waist as his head fell into my lap and he sobbed. I have never seen Jacob like this I didn't understand this. Where was my carefree friend? Why did he have to hurt for my stupid mistake?

I didn't understand it. The loss was mine, all mine. The pain, the guilt, the anguish this was all mine. I was condemned to feel this for the rest of my existence I didn't have the choice of dying anymore, I would have to live through eternity feeling this gaping hole within myself. I felt the need to cry but once again no tears came. A dry sob broke through me. This wasn't what I expected at all, did whatever if anything higher up have some way to get back at someone as vile as myself? I didn't deserve to live, I didn't deserve an after life, and I didn't even deserve to stay where I was wallowing in my own agony. Because even if I felt like my insides were ripping me apart I still have Jacob with me. My Jacob, in the truest sense now he was my Jacob and no one else's. This realization hit me like a boulder. Someone that so obviously should not be mine was and the person he truly belonged to would never come back to reclaim him.

As I wrapped my arms around him I felt his warmth go trough me with a shiver. These feelings that I had stowed away so long ago were back. I didn't understand it I had no right to feel this way, not when this person didn't belong to me. He would never belong to me never again. Not after I threw him to the side and let his suffer for so long. Showing him I had my happiness when I took his away so heartlessly. I didn't think of him ever when I had my happiness and now that it was all gone I needed him to console me once more? I was a monster, not because of what I was, no my species had nothing to do with it. My personality was the blackest part of me, I didn't deserve to have love, and never would I deserve that once again. And this angel in my arms now deserved one so much more than I. He deserved someone that would make him happy and never bring along the fate that I was doomed to have for the rest of my life.

I cradled him in my arms and looked down at him. He was so hurt, my best friend, my son, my baby was hurt _and it was all my fault._ His sobs shook me and he was so thoroughly hurt that I knew there was nothing I could do to make him whole again. He was like me a piece of his heart would be forever missing never to return again. But he only had on piece while I had eight. Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmet, my family would never return. I forced myself to think those last three names, Alice my sister, Edward the love of my existence, and Renesmee my one and only child. They were the ones that took that burning in my heart and then poured acid all over it.

I took them all for granted, after our encounter with the Volturi I thought that it was all over that there would be nothing to disrupt our peaceful lives ever again. How was I supposed to know that I had to protect my family from myself? Was I expected to know that I would end up betraying my family in such a way that they would no longer be there anymore? My family was gone and in the place of it was a searing ache in place of where my stone cold heart should be.

"Shhh, Jacob its okay. Shh, you should get some sleep."

"Thanks Bells, but I don't think that I'll be able to sleep in a long time."

"Well at least try, for me please. I don't want to see you hurting so much for my stupid mistake."

At this Jacob turned around to stare at me.

"What do you mean your mistake? You didn't do anything. Nothing at all Bella. Don't blame yourself for this. It wasn't anyone's fault we just weren't strong enough for them."

"But that's exactly it Jacob I didn't do _anything_ if maybe I helped then it wouldn't be like this if I didn't listen to Edward maybe you would still have Renesmee with you right now, maybe everything would be different."

"Bella stop talking like that. Even if you were there the same thing would have happened it's just that if you were there too then I would _really _have lost everyone."

Jacob was really being way too good for me. I didn't deserve him, I didn't help, I didn't save them, when I was probably the only one who could've I didn't. I can see it right now the old stone alleyways of Volterra surrounding me, holding me there in the darkness, Jane smiling wickedly at me while I was completely defenceless trying to protect my family. In the end I was the one who lost, Jane won she got to me and once I was out of the picture her twin proceeded with my loved ones. The only reason I was allowed to survive is because Aro had never seen anyone like me, he wanted me in his own little collection of _gifted_vampires.


	2. Flashback

_-Flashback-_

There was Jane smiling evilly at us. Once again, I saw her just looking at us. But then I

felt the pain, the unbearable pain that was searing throughout my entire body, but why?

This shouldn't be happen; my power should be protecting me right now. As I looked to

those near me I saw my husband and child looking beyond as if they were frozen. They

were beautiful even in stillness.

Renesmee was so beautiful now; she had grown into a find young lady and was blissfully

happy with Jacob. But then I saw the stillness in her figure and this shouldn't be her

expression. She should be happy! She just got engaged and was going to be as happy as

her father and I were. This wasn't right the stillness, the lifelessness that I saw in her face

now.

And Edward my husband had this same look in his face. I didn't comprehend what was

happening the pain was so unbearable. I looked forward to see Alec and Jane smiling

evilly. Then I saw Aro and some female that I didn't notice until now. Aro's face was

grim, as if he didn't want to see us like this. But that wasn't right, if he didn't want to see

us like this then he wouldn't have come in the first place. What was his reason for

coming here, it had been so long since that last time he came that I had almost completely

forgotten about the fact that he said he would return. But there was no reason for it now.

And I also wanted to know why wasn't my power working against them?

Then I saw it. The silver thing gleaming in Aro's hand. I didn't know what it was at first

until I really recognized it; a lighter. He lit them with this small flame. And then a low

pained howl pierced through the silence.

_-Flashback-_


	3. Daylight

Sitting there in that barren field Jacob and I contemplated what we would do with our

lives now. Missing those that we loved the most I had no feeling left in me. The only

reason I was still properly functioning was because Jacob was still in my arms. He was

there with me the whole time and I knew that I needed to be strong for him, because if he

saw me break down now he would try to console _me_. But I didn't deserve that no, I

deserved death if anything. Once again his sobs shock my entire body.

"Shh, baby shhh you need to get some sleep." I crooned at him. I would always feel like a

mother figure to him now. That was what I was and would be forever even if I myself

knew that this entire time I never stopped loving him.

He slowly fell asleep as the sun became to rise and my skin began to glow. As he snored

softly in my lap I finally began to sob. Strangely enough I feel wet moisture on my skin

and I had no idea how this happened. Maybe even with our kind, when we felt such great

hurt we were also able to cry. I just bent down stroking my baby's hair as he slept but he

wasn't even safe in his dreams. I see his dreams and they weren't pleasant. For some

reason God had decided to give me the all of their gifts after they had passed on to

somewhere better. I had _all_ of their gifts now, the mind reading, the visions, being able to

feel what other's felt, and being able to communicate to everyone silently.

Just seeing his dreams hurt me, because even in his dreams where he was completely free

Jacob didn't blame me. When he saw Jane release me he still felt relief. I didn't

understand how he could not blame me. All of this was certainly my fault, there was no

other answer to it and yet Jacob still thought me surviving this was a good thing.

I gently picked him up and proceeded to the main roads to find a taxi. I needed to get on a

plane but I knew that we weren't going to return to Forks. No, we were never going back

there. We were going to Denali I would need to tell the people who were the closest thing

that I had to family now.


	4. Blame

"_What_?" asked Tanya. Her voice was full of disbelief. I knew the feeling. It was still so hard to understand what happened. I didn't know why it happened either, it just did.

"I said their gone Tanya, all of them." I said evenly I wouldn't let her feel my pain. I didn't need to make it worse for them. I didn't come here because I needed a shoulder to cry on I came here so that they would know that they would never see the one's closest to them again.

I knew how blunt I sounded. How heartless, but if I showed any emotion now I would crack.

"H-how did it happen?" Tanya stuttered. I knew what would come next the dry sobs. Vampires almost never stuttered only when we feel some of the deepest emotions do we strip our eloquently structured sentences to show any true emotion.

"THEY'RE GONE OKAY? THEY'RE JUST GONE! JUST SHUT UP!" Jacob shouted. This was the first thing that he'd said since we'd gotten here. I could see the pain in his eyes while I was trying to explain to Tanya and the rest of them. He'd kept his mouth shut for that entire time but I think that Tanya's repeat of this stupid question which was really getting on my nerves also finally made him snap. Then he broke into sobs.

"Shhh, baby shhh it's going to be okay." I crooned into his ear.

When I straightened up again I saw Tanya staring at me.

"What?" I asked. For some reason her expression was no longer of sadness, but it was of pure hatred. She looked at me like she wanted to burn me with her eyes.

"How. Are. You. Able. To. Be. So. Calm?" She asked slowly making every word feel like a sentence.

"I'm not. I just need to seem it so that Jacob won't have to feel bad for me when he's the one that's hurting so much. I just want to protect him." I said too low and fast for Jacob to be able to hear or at the very least understand what I said.

"And why do you care so much about _him_? What has _he_ done for _us_? He probably just stood there and did nothing while our kind was being killed. He is a _dog_ after all" Tanya sneered loud enough so that everyone in the house could hear. She looked so mad that I was afraid she was going to do something to hurt Jacob.

"I won't let you talk to him like that. You weren't there. Jacob almost risked his own life to save them. We both tried so hard to save them, so hard. We just weren't able to. He did everything he could. And listen to my words carefully. The next time you say anything about him like that I _will_ rip your head off. Because we both know that I'm stronger then you." I growled at her. I would not have her talk about Jacob like that. No one could talk about him like that.

"And why do you care so much about him Bella? Is it that you have already forgotten about Edward? My dear cousin in law, I didn't think that even you could be so heartless. But then again it was you that stole him from me. I could have been perfectly able to keep Edward out of danger. _I_ would have been able to give him a good life until you came and stole him away from me. Tanya growled her teeth were bared and she had crouched down.

Hearing his name said so many times tore my heart apart. That hole that I thought had disappeared all those years ago had finally come back and now that I was a vampire everything was intensified. But I could also deal with it better now. I knew that I couldn't break down here. I just couldn't.

_Bitch, she stole Edward from me and then let him die. Now she's probably sleeping with that dog of hers. _ Tanya thought and I already saw her pounce before she actually did it. I dodged and then glared at her.

"Is that what you think? That I've already forgotten my family? My husband and my child? That in these couple of days I've been able to move on? And that you think I've moved on with my _son?_" I asked her incredulously.

"Well I sure wouldn't put it past _you._ I think you should know now. I never even liked you. I was just keeping up appearances because I knew that Edward would cut all ties with us if I were to show my _disgust_ towards you." And then she pounced again.

"Tanya. I think you should know something. I've already acquired the skills of all of _my_ family. I know what you're thinking, I can see what you're going to do, and I'm sure as hell stronger than you. So don't even think about trying anything like fighting me because you've already pissed me off enough. But I still don't feel like killing anyone today." I said coldly.

"Come on Jacob it's time to go." I stooped down and picked up Jacob from the ground where he was looking up at me astonished. And I walked out the door with Tanya staring blankly at our backs. I thought I could find safety and acceptance with the Denali's and now I know that it was all a lie. The only one I could really trust was Jacob.


	5. Sun Set

It had already been weeks. And we had no idea where we were going to go. But during these weeks I haven't been able to do anything for Jacob. He just sat around not saying anything. I know that the incident with Tanya had been traumatic for him at the least. This was because once we told them then it finalized the fact that they were gone. Our family was gone and we were never going to get them back, because of _my_ stupid mistake.

"Renesmee, No! Don't go please. Please stay with me, I need you!" Jacob cried.

Here they were again. The nightmares it had been happening every night since they left us. He would just dream of her and nothing else. I could hear the pain in his voice as he said her name; it was almost like with I though of _him_. There was nothing more I could do for him then be here though because if I was going to tell the truth to myself, on the inside I was dead. Isabella Swan, Bella Cullen. They were gone.

I was nothing more than a shell of what I used to be. I wouldn't even be this much if it weren't for my need to protect Jacob.

I had no idea what was ahead for us. But I had to believe that there was something better than this. If not for me at least for him. He didn't deserve this he was better than this. It was my fault he was even caught up in this mess. Not just for what I had done while in Italy. But if I hadn't let myself fall in love with him then he would have been able to find someone that was better for him. Someone relatively normal who could have lived a full life with him. Without the constant pain and despair.

I was the one who brought him into this. I knew that I had to bring him out of this. He had so little time together. We all had so little time with each other. We finally thought that we had the perfect lives yet something like this happened.

The Volturi I thought of them with disgust. They knew that their invitations to us were futile. They knew we would never join them. We weren't as malevolent as them. But their advances to us continued. Once they finally figured out that we were not going to join them their decision was to terminate us. Get rid of the threat once and for all so that we could never overthrow them.

While I sat there contemplating our future something came to me. July. It was July. July 31st to be exact.

That was how I knew where we were going to go next. New Hampshire. It was where they would have wanted us to go anyways. They would have wanted us to continue with our lives. To be able to live somewhat. I knew that was what they wanted for us. Because that was what _He _wanted for me after that time he left.

When I thought about that time now, no pain came. Those times… they were simple. There was only me and Jake and we were happy. We didn't need anyone else for our happiness; well no that wasn't entirely true. I always needed someone else but I was relatively happy with Jake and I knew that he was happy with me. Those times were so simple that I yearned for them, to be in the garage drinking cokes while laughing at something stupid that Jake had done once again.

But that's when I thought of someone. While thinking that we no longer had anyone but each other we had forgotten about someone else we had. Someone else that would be able to be there with us. Before we went to New Hampshire we would need to make a pit stop.

I packed Jacob into my Bentley convertible. I knew a lot about this car pretty much because all the incidents that led to how we were now Jacob could never shut up about it. It was supposed to be this car that was debuted at the Geneva International show in 1999 but after that it was never put into production. It was one of a kind. The only one in the world. It was something that I couldn't leave behind when we left Forks pretty much because it was the last thing _he_ had given me. And for no apparent reason at all.

-_flashback-_

"Were almost there Bella just a little more" He whispered into my ear.

"Really Edward it's been more than a decade and yet you still don't understand that I just don't find surprises as pleasant and some people claim to." I snapped back at him.

I was in a good mood that day and it was the only reason I was even dealing with his antics. Today was the day that I was going to go with Jacob to find a suit for his big day. Edward and I had already agreed that they could get married next year and I wanted to find Jacob's suit before anything pretty much because I knew it would take a while to find a tailor for him and of course because being Jacob he always put things to the last minute and I wasn't going to let that happen when he was looking for something to get married to my daughter in. I swear Alice was rubbing off on be but I really didn't mind as long as I wasn't as obsessive as she was.

"Now Bella I know for a fact that you are going to love this surprise. I don't think there would be anyone in the world who wouldn't like what I'm about to give you right now."

We were walking deeper and deeper into the forest and I had no idea where we were going.

"Edward… your not giving me _another _house are you?" I questioned.

Ever since that cottage and how much easily I took that gift Edward had begun to have a thing about real estate. I now had some kind of property on every continent of the world and I really thought that he was just wasting his money like that buying houses that we may never even visit.

"Not after the way you reacted to the palace in Dubai Bella. I learn from my mistakes" Edward chuckling at the memory of the fit I threw when I learned he actually bought me a _Palace._ But the fit was justified I mean when would I ever need a palace?

"Okay Bella you can open your eyes now." He whispered into my ear.

Once I opened my eyes I was shell shocked. This was probably the single most beautiful car that I had ever seen in my life. For some reason it reminded me of my truck even thought I didn't have a single thing in common with it. This was a sleek black sports car that just exuded the aura of power and speed.

"Oh. My. God. Edward it's beautiful." I whispered.

"Only the best for you love." He whispered once again into my ear as his arms encircled my waist and he kissed the crook of my neck and placed his chin there.

I turned around and pulled him into a kiss.

"I really love it. It's so perfect. Thank you Edward." I said against his lips.

-_flashback-_

I smiled at the memory while driving on the freeway towards the sunset with Jacob snoring quietly next to me. And here it was another little quirk that happened to me once I was alone. I no longer sparkled in the sun light. I didn't know why this was and I didn't even know if it was a good thing or not. It of course let me fit in with the humans better but then it also made me different from the family that I used to have. I no longer had that tie to them.


	6. Long Overdue Explanation Note

Hey everyone ! It's been... Well actually it's been YEARS. Today I stumbled upon and was reminded of the fact that I have a story here. Seriously I forgot about it and I'm sorry. I've been contemplating if I should continue this or not... but seriously I've lost the passion that I used to have for Twilight. It is not longer as special to me as it used to be. I don't feel that connection to the characters that I used to. I will no longer be doing anything on (I swear I had a couple of other stories here but I can't for the life of me find them Lol.) I have tried another story sharing site called but that was a pretty short lived affair because it's just very messy and not at all attractive. If anyone is still interested in my writing / the stories I have to share I hope that you can join me on where I have my newest Long term Fiction Ideally? Yours.

Link: .com/forums/topic/331331-ideally-yours-updated-january-22nd-2011/

^ You have to be a member of this site to see fictions, but really there is some HIGH quality work on this site. If anyone actually sees this post and goes to Soompi I personally recommend you read anything by , Solangel or HiroLovesMeia. Really I can't understand how these people are not published authors yet.

I also have a couple of shorts which are linked in my signature on this site. Really just me babbling some short stories that come to my mind

If anyone was wondering about this story ... well first of all it wasn't actually called 100. That was kind of a lie LOL. I remember I tried to post it as 100% but for some reason would not let me put the % in the title which I still find odd. And no this was not a Bella x Jacob fiction. Now that I know for sure that I am not going to finish this fiction I think I owe anyone who sees this and was interested in my story some closure just to know what would have happened.

Basically Bella and Jacob were not going to end up together. I had played around with them being together and it just didn't work for me. In the end Jacob was going to find a nice normal girl and imprint on her and get married and have a normal life and all that jazz. Bella would have stayed as the supportive friend / mother figure / fun aunt to whatever little wolfy offspring Jacob decided to have. That was how the story was supposed to end, so really Bella didn't get her ending. I still don't know what happens to her, though I hope that she was able to find some vampires who could be her new family or maybe she could have started a new family herself, because with Jacob's marriage it would also have meant that he would be staying human which means he would have died sooner or later leaving Bella alone again.

And to answer some questions in the comments, the Volturi didn't kill Bella because no matter what Aro felt that Bella was very valuable. Her shield had gotten much stronger since the end of Breaking Dawn and he couldn't help but feel like it would be a waste to kill her. They were no longer a problem during 100 because I would have included a face off between Bella and Jacob and the Volturi where they would have learned that she had acquired the powers of all the Cullens so basically, he would not have had enough power to do anything about Bella. Also about the Wolf Pack, 100 takes place around a decade of Breaking Dawn. No matter how strong the bonds within the pack were, they would not have lasted that long. Jacob stayed with Renesmee because he loved her and truthfully got along very well with her family. (Rosalie and Jacob still wouldn't have been the best of friends, but they would have become friendly) So really the Wolf Pack in my mind went back to Forks or in Lea's case went off to create a new life, most likely as humans by deciding to stop changing.

So once again I'm sorry that I will not be finishing this fiction (not like anyone cares LOL) and for those who are interested I hope that you can join me at Soompi !

~Kathy Swan Cullen (Though now I would rather be referred to as KathyFish x3)


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